Hollywood Cop (1987) – Kidnapping your senses

Here it is, the aptly named beginning of Amir Shervan’s legendary Hollywood period. There are shootouts, fistfights, terrible dialogue, painful acting, a tacky kidnapping plot, and some of the poorest quality production you’ll ever have the pleasure to witness. Hollywood Cop is a trash filled caper that runs in circles for most of its overly long duration, resplendent in all its dirt cheap glory…

Mutant Hunt (1987) – Junkie robots get junked

Mutant Hunt is pure, kitschy, low budget Sci-fi, featuring a totally unoriginal story, soundtracked to cheap perfection, and packed full of woeful action. Everything from Blade Runner to The Terminator has been unashamedly copied and stuffed with an impressive amount of narrative offal. Oh, and for a movie filled with fight scenes, these are some of the worst you’ll ever see…

Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity (1987) – To infinity and beyond!

The poster promises “Big Movie. Big Production. Big Girls.” I’m not convinced they thought too hard about the last part, and the rest is an outright lie. What we do get is a tacky, Star Wars take on Richard Connell’s short story The Most Dangerous Game. So it goes, our unsuspecting, shipwrecked slave girls stumble into the dark and misty world of an insane hunter hermit and must fight for their freedom…

Cyclone (1987) – Superbikes and synthesisers

Don’t be fooled by the title, this is not a lame disaster movie about inclement weather, it’s actually an awesome, totally 80s, on-the-run flick, involving a radical, military prototype motorbike that shoots lasers and runs on hydrogen. There’s a tonne of goodness on offer, including a half-decent story, a sweet future bike, destructive car chases, teen heartthrob Heather Thomas, and stuntman extraordinaire Dar Robinson…

R.O.T.O.R (1988) – Stupid SciFi shenanigans

Imagine taking The Terminator and RoboCop and melting them for scrap in Megacity One, while a Noir protagonist watches on, narrating of course. Now water it down, and throw in irrelevant mouthfuls of dialogue, and you’ve got this strangely amusing, postmodern rubbish heap…

Miami Connection (1987) – Retro overload

Let me introduce you to a corrupt, 1980s Florida with beaches and neon as far as the eye can see. Here, a spirited Tae Kwon Do band fights a camp, camo-wearing street gang and a horde of drug-dealing motorcycle Ninjas. They do so only with the power of friendship and martial arts, all backed by a deliciously cheesy, original soundtrack…